CWOC the Blog

I read over something the other day that really hurt my heart. I had some statistical numbers from churches in my denomination and was reading through some that had “closed.” One of these that got my attention was not a new church that was just a year or two old. It was an established church that had been in a major city of its region for MANY years. The average Sunday morning attendance was just a tad under 100 in its last year of numerical accountability. It went from being an established, time-proven ministry of older, white adults in a racially diversified area to CLOSING.

I began to think on this situation and realized what had happened. They had gotten a NEW PASTOR in. Within ONE YEAR he had tried to bring about such rapid change that, instead of building the church, he destroyed it.

Let me say something here. I am all for PROGRESS and PROGRESSIVE ideas. BUT THIS WAS A TRAGEDY. I’ll be the first to admit that in my 20 years of ministry some people would think my radical ideas have probably offended a person here or there along the way. But, God knows my heart, that was never my intention.

If you are a PASTOR or LEADER in a church, please hear my heart: YOUR FIRST PRIORITY IS PEOPLE. To me, the tragedy of the church closing was not that one less stroke count in the church column is available. To me, the tragedy is in this: where are the 87 wounded people who probably had their hearts crushed because this person can in and, like the proverbial bull in the china shop, ran over everything they had been accustomed to?

If you are a PASTOR or LEADER then lead your flock, don’t drive them.

If you are a PASTOR or LEADER and you want to change your church, allow me to give you some advice. I’m writing this article to PASTORS / LEADERS who are pastoring “established” and “set-in-their-ways” churches. There are three things you will have to KEEP reminding yourself to do/have: (1)Pray, (2)Plan, and (3) PATIENCE.

First, everything you birth has to be birthed out of prayer. I’m not talking some King James blah-blah-blah. I’m talking a heartfelt communication/dialogue between you and the Big Guy who really owns the church and sheep that you have stewardship over – the KING HIMSELF. Don’t forget that: IT IS NOT YOUR MINISTRY. It is the ministry you have been GIVEN STEWARDSHIP OVER. You will be accountable to the Owner one day. He’s not going to reward you for the rate of your progress as much as He will reward your faithfulness to HIM and HIS SHEEP (those that are found and those that are still lost).

Second, if you want to change your church then you must be strategic in planning. In your time of prayer, God will definitely give you plans and ideas. Don’t move too fast. If the people’s maturity level is still at “baby food” then don’t try to force-feed them a piece of steak. Plan for where they are. Plan events and functions that can build community. Win their hearts. Win their confidence. Win their trust. They ARE NOT your enemies. Don’t do things that would portray you as one to them. Yes, their musical tastes may suck. Hint: SOMEONE ELSE PROBABLY THINKS YOURS DOES TOO. Plan things you can do to the facilities that will make them excited. But, don’t touch any sacred cows. Not yet, any way. That will be a good place to lead into the next point…

Finally, be PATIENT! For your first year, I would suggest do not do anything that would rock the boat. Just love the people and preach the Word of God. Nearly 20 years ago, I began my first pastorate. The church was an established ministry with had dwindled down to around 25-30 people whose median age was post-retirement age. Mind you, my wife and I were 24 years-old with a six week-old baby boy. The only other small child in the church was a little boy whose grandmother brought him with her. The youngest couple was in their 40s. Their church had been strapped financially and had some administrative woes going on for some time that had led to some entrenched leadership malfunctions. I didn’t know what the heck I was doing. I had a four year degree from a Bible College, but I learned more in the first six months of pastoring than I did in four years of classes. One of the first things the Lord laid on my heart was Proverbs 18:21. I put a big banner in the church that said, “We are speaking LIFE! Proverbs 18:21” Sure, now that I think back on it, it was probably cheesy. But, it was effective. It was a non-threatening approach for me to let them know I was not going to hear or dwell on the negative of their past. We were moving forward and talking the LIFE-giving Word of God. Be patient. Let the people get to know your HEART. Let the sheep you’ve been given stewardship over get to know your voice. Your patience will breed trust. Look at it as sowing and reaping. If you sow patience you will, in turn, reap the trust of the people. Even after that first year though – don’t be hasty in changing your little Rome in one day. It has been stated that a pastor does not become fully effective in his church until after 5 years. Move SLOOOOOOOOW. It will save you heartache and a backache from having to load and unload the U-Haul when you move. Getting a one-way U-Haul ticket is not what you want for your first “Pastor’s Appreciation Day.”

Pray, Plan, and be PATIENT (yes, the latter is in CAPS for emphasis – I’m screaming it because it is the hardest thing out of the three).

You can either be an “Agent of Change” or an “Agent of Death” – you’re the leader – you decide which.

Several years ago, a friend gave me a set of TAPES (yes, there used to be tapes for any of you who didn’t know that – LOL). The tapes were from Bishop TD Jakes’ annual Pastor’s Conference. In one of the messages, Bishop Jakes said something simple, yet profound: “If you can do anything else than ministry with your life, do it. Don’t get into the ministry for money. Go open up a fish market or something.”

Over the past weeks, my heart had been saddened by things I have seen and heard of people looking for “JOBS” and money-making opportunities in ministry.

I am not trying to be calloused or hard-hearted toward people who “feel” called to ministry and are in transition in their lives – looking for jobs or ways to make money. However, at the same time, I must say this: Ministry is NOT a JOB and it is not to be a source of INCOME.

I know many may think, “Well, then why do you draw a salary from Crossroads?” Why? Because the scriptures states, “The worker deserves his wages” (Luke 10:7, NIV). I serve – yes, serve as in a ‘SERVANT’ at Crossroads as the Senior Pastor. I refer to myself often as the “LEAD SERVANT.” The defining point is that I do not do what I do for money! I do what I do out of a passion for my God and His Kingdom.

Recently, I’ve seen everything from people looking for “ministry opportunities” because they are “between jobs” and they need money to a goofy ad stating, “Send us a seed gift of $150.00 and we will send you a CD with personal prophecies just for you.”

If you feel called to ministry, don’t look for money-making opportunities or gimmicks. Find somewhere to SERVE and trust Jehovah-jireh, the Lord your provider, to reveal Himself in you, through you, and to you.

If you are not ministering out of love, passion, and compassion – stay away from ministry. Please! There’s enough people hurt by charlatans already. Go flip some burgers, dig some ditches, put out some resumes for office jobs. Do something else. DO NOT DO MINISTRY FOR MONEY!

Serve God and His people. If money comes to you through that – let it be a fringe benefit! God will meet your needs – according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19).

I do what I do, not because of money. I do what I do because there is nothing else in life that could fulfill me like this. For THIS REASON I was set apart from my mother’s womb.

Just keeping it REAL!

I sat here at the computer gazing at the screen for a few thoughtless moments. I was rather in the fog as I bounced around the “TO WRITE” or “NOT TO WRITE” question about this article. I wanted to write it, but really felt I wanted to use some terminology that would have a propensity to offend some people. No profanity. Nothing aimed at anyone. Nothing slang. Nothing really crude. Okay, I talked myself into it.

Here it is: NOTHING BUILDS CHARACTER LIKE A GOOD BUTT-WHIPPING!

Before I get into this, if that offends you then grow up. You probably heard worse than that on your soap opera or favorite sitcom in the past week. There, I love you and you love me (or at least your supposed to – got to in order to get into that celestial city we all want to make home). And, Elijah, when mocking the Baal prophets concerning the unresponsiveness of their god to their pleas actually said, “Maybe your god is out relieving himself.” You’ll have to address that with God later if that offends you. Time to grow some skin folks. There is a generation out there that thinks Christians are irrelevant because we try to be so religiously-politically correct.

Now, back to business. Character is something that I really feel is lacking in the generation we walk among. Let me explain “what” I mean when I use the word “character.” In the context of this writing I want character to be thought of as “back-bone, nerve, intestinal fortitude; love for what is good and right; a disdain for half-heartedness; a hate for wrong, injustice, and evil; and a never-give-up mindset.”

I will say this: I’ve known some “characters” who had no “character.” (Pardon me while I chuckle to myself)

There are some things that build character in our lives. All of them would entail a good butt-whipping.

First, our parents were supposed to give us good butt-whippings to teach us NOT to do wrong. My mom once lamented to my wife that maybe she beat me too often. My wife chimed in: “You didn’t beat him enough.” Let’s allow it to suffice to say I had my numerous and routine appointments with a belt and a switch. Now, at the age of 44, I realize that was not a lack of love or abuse. It was, indeed, something I needed to mold my character!

Second, there are situations of adversity or – I’ll keep it palatable – places in life that are hard. These areas build character. They often entail us having to DO things we DO NOT like. When my kids have to clean their room or help old dad in the yard and they are whining the whole way, I simply look at them and say, “It builds character!”

Then, there are experiences we have that just flat out punch us in the mouth. Tonight, my 12 year-old and my 9 year-old both had such experiences. They are playing football and winding up their seasons. Both teams got shut out. The older son’s team was simply decimated. When my 12 year-old and I arrived home we were in the garage where I was helping him pull off his pads. He lamented on how poorly he and his whole team played. I simply replied, “Tonight son, you got a lesson in character.”

The last character builder I will mention here is very painful. It is a whipping that can go on whipping for a long time. It is FAILURE. One of the greatest and most painful elements of failure is QUITTING! When I was in high school I loved football. I grew up in a small, rough town. We would play football in yards and fields and go as hard in pads as we did outside of pads. My senior year I was several weeks into football practice when my home went into major upheaval. There was utter chaos. In the midst of all that I succumbed to a lot of pressures a kid my age shouldn’t have to endure and I QUIT football. That was 27 years ago. I still feel a gnaw in my gut when I think about it. I know some may say, “Pastor Tim, you need to get over that. It was in the past.” I beg to differ with you. That sting of pain from quitting never left me. And, I have vowed from that time I would never quit anything again – NEVER! I have faced what seemed to be insurmountable odds and stuck it out, refusing to quit, and eventually saw God turn the tide. I have witnessed the miraculous when it would have been easier to quit and walk away. But, I remember the disgust I felt from quitting and it built CHARACTER in me.

My friend, the fact is this: WE ALL NEED CHARACTER! And, no matter where you are in the area of character development, you are probably going to learn more of it (like it or not, class is in progress). I once said, “I feel I’ve been through so much that I should have about ten doctorates in character development.” Well, if that is the case, I’m sure I’m currently working on my eleventh.

Here is the bottom line in these “life-whippings” that differentiate character and non-character: WHAT HAVE YOU LEARNED? You see, everyone has been through all of the scenarios listed above that can mold character in us. Yet, many have failed to learn the lesson from the classroom.

What’s the difference? Simply, some learned from the experience (thereby passing the test) and others simply never learned and no change came in their heart or way of thinking.

Have you ever tasted the disgusting sting of defeat to the point you don’t want to ever experience that again? Has God ever spanked you with conviction and you knew without doubt that you didn’t want to go there again? Have you ever been slapped in the face with adversity and just wallowed in misery for a while and later realized how miserable you were? Have past failures built real strength inside of you? If you can answer yes to any or all of these then you have probably learned a priceless degree in CHARACTER 101.

These things formed back-bone in you. They gave you the nerve to push through the pain. They instilled intestinal fortitude in you to raise the bar in areas in your own life. They created a passion inside of you for what was good and right while making you cringe when you witnessed wrong, injustice and evil. They gave you so much heart to overcome that you have a strong intolerance to half-heartedness.

The irony in all of this is: WHAT WE THOUGHT WAS MAKING US WEAK ACTUALLY MAKES US STRONG!!!!!

Allow me to welcome you to class today. CHARACTER 101 is now in session!

Here are some of the things I’ve learned — the hard way.

1.  Money can’t build a church.  In four years I spent $300,000 buying furniture, equipment, paying for trips, people’s training, functions.  Everything — we’d just pay for it.  Thinking that would bring growth.  It didn’t.

2.  Every person is not a leader.  I made a tremendous mistake by not "learning from other’s mistakes".  When I assumed the pastorate here I "inherited" leadership from the previous pastor (who is a dear friend of mine).  For some reason, I assumed I could take the people he had in leadership and do something with them he could not.  I’ve learned from that this lesson: IF THEY WERE NOT LEADERS UNDER HIM THEY WOULD NOT BE LEADERS UNDER ME.  John Maxwell tells the story of sitting down with the CEO of a major hotel chain.  This was an "elite" hotel… not a Holiday Inn.  This company began going throughout the world and purchasing struggling companies.  Maxwell asked the man what was the first thing they would do when purchasing a new location.  To which the man replied: FIRE ALL THE STAFF.  The man saw Maxwell’s shock and informed him: "They were the problem the thing wasn’t working to start with.  You can’t make someone into something they are not."

Even in starting a new work you need to be cautious not to try to "put" someone in leadership or in a position just because they’re available and you "need" someone.  Wait for the right people who are true leaders.

3.  You, as a leader, must be a person of INFLUENCE.  This may sound hard, but I don’t mean it to be… if you can’t INFLUENCE people stay where you are and keep doing what you are doing.  If you can’t meet people and talk to strangers you are not influencing people.  If you don’t talk to your neighbors where you live right now about spiritual matters then you can’t grow a church.  If you are not INFLUENCING people right where you are then don’t take your family to another city and attempt to become something you are not.

However, if you can walk into Starbucks order a cup of coffee and carry on a conversation with the person behind the counter and open a door of opportunity to share a brief second about "what your vision of ministry is" then you are a INFLUENCER.

I mean this.  I’ve seen guys go to cities, get a building, put up a sign and just expect people to come in.  It does not work.  It will not work.  You have got to be able to pursue people.

The encouraging thing about this is YOU CAN LEARN and DISCIPLINE yourself to INFLUENCE people.

4.  Don’t study too much.  Again, I hope this doesn’t sound too hard, but people could really care less if you are a great preacher communicator.  There is an old proverb: "PEOPLE DON’T CARE HOW MUCH YOU KNOW UNTIL THEY KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CARE."  If you lock yourself away for hours reading and studying just to preach you are over-killing.  When it comes to WORD time just feed yourself.  Don’t get too caught up in sermonizing.  Bishop TD Jakes said plainly he doesn’t write sermons.  He lets the Holy Spirit feed him from the Word and God gives him revelation and inspiration to put messages together.

If it doesn’t taste good to you first then you can’t really feed it to someone else.  Never read the Bible just to get a message to preach.  First, read it to get a message to live.  You will never build a ministry locked away in a room with Bibles, books, and computers.  You’ve got to allow the WORD to build you and then let God release you into the sea of humanity.

Mind you, you must read books, watch videos, Christian TV, listen to tapes, etc.  But that is not the extent of the ministry.  The ministry involves PEOPLE.

5. Don’t study too little. I know this sounds like an unbalanced statement as compared to the previous point. However, it will do you and the people you minister to no good for them to come to whatever your ministry has to offer if you are empty. In our busy, fast-paced society we had better have something of substance to offer people when they enter our ministry facilities. Fluff may pacify people for a while, but sooner or later they’ll get tired of milk and toast. They will begin to yearn for the deeper things of God.

Find a balance between points 4 and 5.

6.  This is one of the most important things I’ve learned: YOU NEED A TEAM.  Church growth experts agree… in starting a new ministry you NEED TEAM.  Ministers flying solo have a 90% failure rate.  If you are truly called to this I encourage you to wait, formulate your vision… write it down.  Begin to share it with people and ask them to pray about buying in and giving you six months to a year to help you work in this ministry when you are ready to begin it.

Here are some of the basic positions that you will find helpful: 1. Someone to do your music ministry.  2.  Someone to work with the children.  3.  Someone to work with the teens.  4.  Someone who is very administrative.  5.  Someone who is very pastoral who can help you love people into the kingdom.  Even if your giftings are not pastoral this latter person can help you.

6.  Finally, a ministry will not grow if the leader does not PRAY.  I’m talking prophetic declaration over that thing and bathing it continually in the Word of God.